Promises, promises.

With the new year fast approaching, I was thinking the other day of what my New Year's Resolution would be. Normally, I don't make them. I kind of feel that if I decide to do something, I will do it, not wait for the new year. No time like the present, right? However, in thinking about what all I have accomplished this year and the fact that the New Year is soon, I figured, what the hell.

So, here it is. I am going to try to "put myself out there." Socialize more. Many have asked why it is that I am still single, or why it is that I have yet to "market myself." My explanation/excuse has been that I simply do not have the time. Granted, my schedule is busy with all my activities, work, school, gym, cooking, but somehow I have managed to see Sarah S. at least once a week and been able to do numerous other activities as well. So really, if I were to sit down and plan, I would have the time. So, I guess the only thing that is really holding me back is... me.

I am concerned with, and have mentioned to several of you, about losing control of my life. I feel as though that is my real deterrent. I have big issues with letting go of certain things. Like in a previous post, I have worked so hard for what I have, and I refuse to let anything stand in the way of that.

When people are trying to pin me down for dates or times to go out and do things, I am constantly thinking "I still want Wednesday free for me, can't do it Tuesday or Thursday because of the gym,..." I am the excuse queen. I even have trouble with scheduling with my trainer, which is what irritates me more when he has to cancel. It takes me forever to chose a day, and then I have to go through the entire process again, because he double booked?!? Agh.

I use to love doing things in the middle of the week though. Earlier this year, I had a blast with my on the whim nights, like Lindsay's birthday. Normally, I would shy away from doing anything like that, unless it were really, really important. As we all know Lindsay's birthday is.

In trying to take all that in and forcing myself to "let go," I am going to try to make myself more readily available for outings. I am going to say "yes" more than I do "no." This will just be one more mental hurdle that I am going to have to over come.

Here goes.

No Fluffing Required

It has been said by many, usually following my response to some mushy, gushy, overly sappy story, that I am just not normal. Particularly when it comes to expressing those types of feelings. Usually when my friends tell me stories of sweet things their significant others have done, I usually follow up with "vomit." I can't handle it. Can't take it.

I especially grow exceedingly suspicious of those who are overly complimentary. I can handle the occasional "you look nice today," but anything further and I get extremely uncomfortable. My immediate thought is, "what are you up to," or "what do you want?"

When guys in the past have tried to be super sweet or romantic to me, my gag reflex kicks in. I can hardly stand it in movies too. I will occasionally get those girly, high pitched cute noises out of me, but most times I have to cover my face with a pillow. Is that sad, that my reaction to someone expressing their love is the same as if their finger was getting cut off?

Even a slow dance sends me running for the sidelines. I can swing dance, line dance, and shake my booty anytime, anywhere, but when you crank up the ballads, I'm out.

It makes me wonder though. Is there something fundamentally wrong with me, or am I just quirky like that? Perhaps I need a sign on my back that says "Saps Need Not Apply."

Bouncing Mere (In Stores Now)

Last night, I was at the gym. (Like you haven't heard that before). I did my warm up, did my abs, which included cable crunches (which I love by the way!), and then it was time to sit out in the hallway by the door and consume my power bar. As I sat there and waited for the class to end, I recalled thinking, "Is that Rich in there? Oh well, must be teaching a double tonight."

Then I noticed that it was rather odd that I was the only one out in the hallway. Although, folks have been known to get there in the nick of time, so I really didn't think much more of it. When the class let out, I walked in, moved over to my bike and began to put my cycle shoes down when I was asked if I had read the schedule this week. "Um, obviously not I guess."

Class was canceled! Who does that? Who has time to get to the 5:30 class? I mean really. I can barely get there before 5:30 and change and all that. Grrrrr.

So, I asked him what I could do and that I had to do something because I had eaten that bar. So, I went out and got on the treadmill for 35 el minutes-o, and sweat was pouring down my face like a big fat pig. Thinking that was enough, I grabbed my stuff and headed over to the store.

I still had waaaayyy too much energy. I was bouncing up and down the aisles, jumping on my cart and riding down to the ends. Was way to perky with the cashier and manager. When I got home, I was jumping around my house while doing the smallest of things. I jumped all the way over to the thermostat to turn it on, I jumped over to the stairs to put my gym bag on them. I jumped over to the stove to start dinner. Basically I was hopping all over that joint, and scaring the crap out of the cat as well.

I couldn't sit/stand still. I was even jumping in the shower. I am sure that my neighbors love me now. Particularly Jake. He is the guy that lives above and below me. Its really hard to explain, but his kitchen is above my kitchen, and my bedroom is over his. Our stairs run parallel to one another. Our lofts are basically exact opposites of one another. Anyway.....

I am just trying to figure out how to get rid of all this energy. Especially since that time is approaching where I will back in school and my one class is conveniently the same time as spin. I will still be able to make to the weekend class, but what will I do in the middle of the week to get some good old fashion cardio? If it didn't get so dark so quickly, I would start running outdoors again.

Any suggestions from the peanut gallery?

Chance Reunion

This Christmas was chaotic, as is any with my family, but I did get one huge surprise out of it. Christmas Eve we always spend at my maternal grandmothers, but this year, we met during the day. My cousin is a police office and unfortunately since he is the rookie, had to work. So, we met to accommodate his schedule. Shortly after we had cleaned the dishes and unwrapped the presents, it was time for me to head out. I had promised my best friend from high school that I would come and visit her.

It had been approximately four to five years since I last saw her and felt terrible about that. There are very few memories of my childhood that don't contain her. I mean really, you all have heard the tales of Mere and Darcy. We were riots if I say so myself. Anywho. As I called her to let her know that I was on my way, and to prepare, she informed me that another crazy cat would be joining us. Jazzy. I had not seen Jazzy since graduation, and that is no lie. I was so excited.

When I got there, I hugged her parents' necks and we all sat and chatted while waiting on Jazzy's arrival. Then, Darcy informed me that she had had surgery where they had to deflate her lung. She then preceded to tell me that it was no big deal. Um, any procedure where it is necessary that the deflate the thing that makes you breathe and stay alive, is a big deal. Geez.

Moving on. When Jazzy got there, we tried to think of where we wanted to go or what we wanted to do. I don't know who thought of it first, but it was genius. We knew, just knew, that another friend of ours was in town for the holidays and we had to see her. So, we plied in Darcy's car and off we went to find Julie. As we pulled into her driveway, we were all so worried about whether or not she would (1) remember us and (2) want to see us. The two nut heads that I was with started getting all nervous, but I made them stand on the porch with me as we rung the door bell. Her father answered the door and immediately brought us into the living room. "I remember your faces very well, but the names, now you are going to have to help me on that one."

One by one, we reintroduced ourselves. He couldn't believe it. Then down the stairs came Julie's little sister, Michelle, who hung out with us a lot as no one in her year was cool. (Ha, that's right, we were considered the cool kids). Then Julie's older brother came in, Tyler, he hugged Darcy and Jazzy, and then tried to shake my hand and introduced himself. "Dude, we use to work in the office together," were my thoughts, but before I could say anything, he remembered. "Mere!"

Finally, we heard more steps coming down the stairs, JULIE!!! As she came in the room, she had to do a double take. She later told us that she almost started to cry, that she couldn't believe it. It was like magic was in the air. We later found out that she was leaving the next morning to fly back to Utah. Lucky.

We then decided to head over to our old stomping grounds and had dinner in Fayetteville, Applebees to be exact. We just started talking about the past and reminiscing about all the crazy stuff we did in school, all the stupid boys that we dated. We talked about what we are doing now and how much things have changed since we left. It was a terrific night. We laughed harder than I think anyone of us had in a while. We remembered things that I haven't thought about since I left that school.

When I got home that night, I told my mother that I had an amazing time, truly amazing. I forgot about what great times there were in high school. It seems that we tend to only focus on the bad, and forget the good. Well, that night, I got a big dose of it!

As we were saying our goodbyes, we realized that we all have known one another for close to fifteen years, and the fact that we hadn't seen one another for close to seven. Unacceptable ladies! This shall not happen again. We were talking at dinner about planning a skiing trip out to see Julie after the new year. Sign me up!

My Life in the Frozen Tundra

I don't recall having moved to the Arctic Circle, but apparently I have. Granted, I am thrilled to have gotten to see a White Christmas in my life time. Particularly since the last time Georgia saw one, cameras didn't exists. Okay, perhaps that's a stretch, but according to this its been since 1882.

Anyway, this morning I woke up thinking that the snow surely would have been gone by now. Nope. Still snow covered river banks. Then, as I was walking down my porch stairs, I barely noticed some ice on them and almost slipped. Last night at the gym, as if an omen or something, ice barred the entrance from all visitors. I had to help this elderly woman across the ice so that she wouldn't slip. Apparently not going to visit the gym though, just cutting through from the old folks home to go shopping.

This morning my car was completely frosted over. While I was scraping the ice off, it would transfer to my gloves and stick like glue. My fingers were absolutely freezing! Then, as I was pulling out of the drive, a red bug was in front of me. I was so afraid that she would slip and slide all over the place as "black ice" was all around. Finally, I made to the road, safe and sound. The actual roads here are fine, but I noticed in my car that the thermometer said that it was a whopping 19 degrees out.

Ahhh. The same goes for the parking lot at work. There were places all around where folks had dumped out their coffee from their cars and it was frozen solid to the ground. This morning when I went to change out the backup disk, I almost considered staying in the control room. It was sooooo warm. But no, back to my cubicle!

Hopefully Georgia will be... Georgia once more and have an unseasonably warm January and February. Fingers crossed! They just might get frozen that way.

Loaded Pistol

These last few days have been absolutely tiring for me. For three straight days I have gone to the gym. Normally, I don't do that, there is usually a day of rest in between. But I tell you what, my muscles feel fantastic. I'm mentally exhuasted, but my body feels great. Who needs a brain anyhow?

I have noticed something different about me in the last few days though. I have been more competitive than ever. It may be due to a number of things: getting my grades back and doing better in precal than I thought, news at work, getting ready to see family, finishing shopping, the new year, but what I really think did it was my trainer.

I know that I have been hard on him, complaining about his inability to keep a scheduled appointment, and his overall lack of a brain, but he said something the other day that really hit home with me. I know that it was complete lie, and afraid that I took it poorly, later asked me if I knew he was kidding. I was in the middle of our row/exercise/row/exercise routine when he said, "Come on, I had a 75 year old in here earlier today and she didn't complain."

Now, of course I knew he was kidding, but it made me start thinking. I thought about all those mental blocks about working out that I had built up over the years and the ones that I have spent the last year tearing down. I starting thinking about whether or not I was really pushing myself anymore. Granted, what I do now would seem impossible when thrown at the old Mere, from the beginning of this year, but I'm not her anymore. My fitness level has grown tremendously, so, it is time to raise the bar once more.

I caught myself trying to race the guy on the treadmill next to me yesterday. I had thoughts such as,"Come on, you are really giving up now? Ten minutes is not nearly enough little man." During all this, I shaved four minutes off my time. I noticed the other day that I have more bounce now when I run and that sometimes my ear buds almost fall out. When I went to the store the other day following the gym, I was bouncing and bounding up the aisles.

In spin last night, I started thinking about whether or not I was really pushing myself. Granted, I know that I usually work out for a full hour beforehand that my stomach is usually weak by then, but I've started bringing power bars with me. Last night I work really hard during the fast standing intervals that I was afraid my pants would wiggly right off. (I really need to go shopping!)

So, like a trigger had gone off in my head, I am happy and thrilled about the new possibilities that I can create for myself with this new attitude. I just hope that (1) I can stave off the "meat head" mentality and (2) that it lasts through Christmas with all my mom's delectable holiday treats. Darn you woman and your awesome cooking!

Mere-y Christmas...Party

I have to say that every year after the party I proclaim to the world  with fists of rage, that it was so stressful that I am never doing it again. However, this year, I made no such promise. This year seemed so different. No stress, no running out of time. Everything worked out and ran as smooth as glass.

It started with Sarah N. getting into town the same time that I got off work. Although she did have one detour before getting to my house... she brought be a peppermint milkshake. Awww. After devouring my treat (remember I am addicted to mint) we headed off to the store. It only took us an hour to get everything and while we were there, we even order our dinner for the night.

Then we headed over to get our pizza where I was complimented on my hat (I like wearing hats and brooches. Yes, I know that I am old). Then we got home, unloaded the car, put away the groceries, and then nestled on the couch with pizza and beer for a little movie.

The next morning, we woke up, went and got breakfast (somebody had to have a biscuit and couldn't wait on me to make pancakes). We watched yet another movie while we finished our meal, then watched another movie while we started to cook. The time literally flew by and it didn't feel rushed at all. It was all completely calm.

When Sarah went up to get ready, I did some last minute things. Let roomba out, hung a painting that Sarah S. and I had done earlier that week, and some general straightening up. After I put roomba away, I went over to fix the lights under the Christmas tree because he had gotten caught on them a little. I reached down and immediately felt like a hot knife had gone through my finger. I screamed. "What happened?!?" I heard come from the top of the stairs. Not quiet sure myself, I looked around and saw little pieces of broken glass on the floor and one empty like socket on the string of lights. 1 + 1= ouch! The damn light had electrocuted me. So, I carefully reached down and rearranged the lights, went upstairs and per Sarah request, ran my finger under some cold water.

While I was getting ready, and having previously unlocked the door in anticipation of such, Dustin arrived. The first words out of his mouth were, "Whoa, this is sick!" He couldn't get over how large the place was. Apparently they look small on the outside. The rest of the night he was trying to talk Lindsay into moving there. Yay, new neighbors!


Anyway, while he was finishing up his cooking, Mel and Nick came, then Lindsay arrived. The party was getting started. When we had completed putting together the spread, it was hilarious. We were all just standing there starring at the table. We could not believe how gorgeous it looked. Dustin, Sarah and I were just taking pictures to remember what it looked like before we dove in.

Shortly thereafter, my baby brother and his best friend, Hudson, arrived. I have known him since he was just a little guy in elementary school with Kev. Now he is so freaking tall. A few minutes later, O'Hara showed up, another LHS survivor and good friend to Kev. She thinks that it is hilarious that I make my own laundry detergent and has stated that the next time I do it, she wants to help so that she can learn.

                                                             About an hour later, Rickey and Britt showed up. It was funny watching Rickey try to work my stove. He had never cooked with gas before, and Dustin had to show him how. I laughed pretty hard, not gonna lie. Although, I was laughing a lot that night, most particularly because Dustin decided to be festive. When I say festive, I mean that Dustin was making shot after shot of peppermint schnapps and Bailey's. No one else would take shots with him, so I obliged.

Needless to say, by the time 10:30 rolled around I was a bit tipsy, okay, I was drunk. I was trying to help clean up the food so that we all could go down town. I bent down to look in the cabinet for some tubberware for the leftovers, and Dustin bumped me. Yep, I was on the floor. So I stayed there. I sat by the fridge and loaded the items into that were handed to me. It worked out pretty well.

Then we grabbed our coats and jumped into the cars. We had a great time. There was some dancing at Firehouse, some sitting at Allgood, and I sat a lot at 8Es. Mostly because, and I am not proud to admit it, but I sat on a stool and fell right off. I remember it happening too, in slow motion. I recall thinking, "why is the floor getting closer?" (I'm still laughing at myself.)

Anyway, dear, dear Sarah was our fearless leader that night and got us home safely. No one, and I mean no one, got up before 2:00 that day. Sarah was a great mom and even tucked Dustin onto the couch with a blanket. I was proud of myself too. I made it up to my bed room without hurting myself. That's 20 stairs folks, 20! 



Too cute, so I had to add it

It was a great weekend, and I can't wait to do it again. New Year's anyone!

Sarah N. requested that I post about what all we cooked. So, I did on my other blog.