Loaded Pistol

These last few days have been absolutely tiring for me. For three straight days I have gone to the gym. Normally, I don't do that, there is usually a day of rest in between. But I tell you what, my muscles feel fantastic. I'm mentally exhuasted, but my body feels great. Who needs a brain anyhow?

I have noticed something different about me in the last few days though. I have been more competitive than ever. It may be due to a number of things: getting my grades back and doing better in precal than I thought, news at work, getting ready to see family, finishing shopping, the new year, but what I really think did it was my trainer.

I know that I have been hard on him, complaining about his inability to keep a scheduled appointment, and his overall lack of a brain, but he said something the other day that really hit home with me. I know that it was complete lie, and afraid that I took it poorly, later asked me if I knew he was kidding. I was in the middle of our row/exercise/row/exercise routine when he said, "Come on, I had a 75 year old in here earlier today and she didn't complain."

Now, of course I knew he was kidding, but it made me start thinking. I thought about all those mental blocks about working out that I had built up over the years and the ones that I have spent the last year tearing down. I starting thinking about whether or not I was really pushing myself anymore. Granted, what I do now would seem impossible when thrown at the old Mere, from the beginning of this year, but I'm not her anymore. My fitness level has grown tremendously, so, it is time to raise the bar once more.

I caught myself trying to race the guy on the treadmill next to me yesterday. I had thoughts such as,"Come on, you are really giving up now? Ten minutes is not nearly enough little man." During all this, I shaved four minutes off my time. I noticed the other day that I have more bounce now when I run and that sometimes my ear buds almost fall out. When I went to the store the other day following the gym, I was bouncing and bounding up the aisles.

In spin last night, I started thinking about whether or not I was really pushing myself. Granted, I know that I usually work out for a full hour beforehand that my stomach is usually weak by then, but I've started bringing power bars with me. Last night I work really hard during the fast standing intervals that I was afraid my pants would wiggly right off. (I really need to go shopping!)

So, like a trigger had gone off in my head, I am happy and thrilled about the new possibilities that I can create for myself with this new attitude. I just hope that (1) I can stave off the "meat head" mentality and (2) that it lasts through Christmas with all my mom's delectable holiday treats. Darn you woman and your awesome cooking!