Fighting the blues...

I have to say that last night and today has been the first time in a looong time that I can honestly say I feel blue.

I was feeling it last night and forced myself to early retirement, but it did not work. I woke up feeling the same way. I actually did squirt some small insignificant liquid from my eyes (don't tell anybody) last night as I was getting my things ready for today.

Even during lunch, it is a completely beautiful day outside, and I walked to run some errands and grab lunch itself. I even went to my favorite downtown eatery. Still, as I type this blog, I have that empty feeling in my stomach. Why is that, why won't it go away?

I know that I have come a long way, but I also understand that there is still much more ahead of me. Its just that I thought I would be further down the road than I am. The longer it takes sometimes, the emptier I feel.

I also understand that I have been working out more this week than I have been lately, and harder for that matter. I got my heart rate up to 179 the other day, and I really felt dizzy the rest of the night afterwards.

For these reasons, I am taking today, and the rest of the weekend off from working out. I am going to try to catch up on some sleep, and I will be seeing some dear friends as well. Hopefully this will all create one big happy recipe to fill me up with warm fuzzies.

Tough Decision

I was at the gym last night, shocker, I know. I was doing my normal routine after taking a new class, ab attack. I was working on my squats when I noticed a familiar face. Apparently my old trainer survived Russia, because there she was.

When I got on the treadmill and was about 20 minutes in, she came up to me. She told all about her adventures. During one of the days at camp, there was this huge fire that she had to drive through, drive through, that's right, with several of the kids in her car. Geez, its rough out there.

She told me how great I looked and it seemed that I was keeping up with my progress. She said that she didn't want to pressure me, but to be thinking about whether I wanted to stay with Brian or switch back over to her. Dum, dum, dum....

I asked the head trainer, Dante, if there was anyway to have them both. Like work one day with one and the next with the other. Nope, not an option. I have to choose one. How? They are both great in different ways. My arms look fantastic because of Brian, but Jenna got me my butt and flattened my stomach.

This weekend is going to be full of reflection and some serious decision making. I know that it may seem silly to be pouring over something like this, but it is really difficult for me, and they are both really nice, genuine people.

Step One... Admitting you have a problem

"Hi, my name is Mere."

"Hi Mere."

"I'm here because I am addicted to mint."

That's right folks, as crazy as it sounds, I love, love, love mint. Wintermint, spearmint, doesn't matter.

This might gross some of you out, but I love the taste of orange juice just after I have brushed my teeth. (Pause for reaction). At least I can admit it, right?

For this reason, I never have gum, mints, tic tacs, nothing, because I would eat it all in one sitting.

This past weekend, I had, and its her fault for leaving it there, Sarah S. gum in my purse. Notice the had in that sentence. Sorry dear, you'll know better next time.

Furthermore, my mom gave me some tic tac wannabe's this weekend while we were out. She buys them in bulk and just told me to keep a pack. Bad idea. Yep, they're gone too.

Those little Listerine strip thingys, those little mint bead burst things, all of them, I have been devouring by the tons. Anyone who wants a free ride to college, just invest in those companies because who knows how much money I have already poured into them from sales.

My absolute favorite flavor of ice cream, hands down, mint chocolate chip. I don't get it often, because if I did, everything that I have been working towards these last seven months would be completely reversed. Not good, nope, forget that.

I was shopping in the organic section of my local grocery store and found it, the one thing that I had not yet incorporated into my life, mint wise that is. Metro Mint. (Can you hear the celestial music, 'cause I did.) Who ever thought of this is a complete genius. I could not believe my eyes. And, its relatively cheap. I said relatively, back off. To my surprise, I noticed the last couple of times that we have worked out together, my trainer loves them too. See, he is more than just a pretty face.

So, there it is. My confession on one of my biggest vices. I feel better, how about you?

Disadvantaged Roots

There is this quote from one of my most favorite movies about the south that goes something like this...


"What is it with you southern women, you can't make the right decision until you've made all the wrong ones?"


Hi, I'm Mere, have we met?

When I graduated high school and first stepped on campus at GCSU, I was prepared to take on the world. I was a double major in Poli Sci and CJ with ambitions to become a vicious prosecutor.


After working for an attorney starting my freshman year and up to the time that I finally left Milledgeville, that all changed. I dropped Political Science and decided that court reporting or being a paralegal was the life for me. My friend Mike use to call me Erin Brockovich. Particularly after seeing the movie for the first time.


While I was dating the doc, I decided that all I wanted to do was be a homemaker. Raise rugrats and clean house all day, just like his mother had done. (I think I'm gonna be sick)


I then decided that, after having moved and broken up with said doc, that I decided that I needed to get my paralegal degree. Kind of backwards, I know, but it is ABA approved and thought it was worth the time.


Then I decided that HR was the place for me. I have always been good at telling people what to do, why not make a career out of it? I was going to go for my masters and give up all the time invested at ATC. I felt terrible about it, and I was sickened by the idea of so much wasted time. I cannot stand wasting time (you should know this by now).


It wasn't until later, after working for other attorneys (particularly ones that didn't hate all aspects of their life) that I learned that being an attorney is not such a death sentence. Although my friend Andy would disagree and wishes that he had saved the money spent on law school for his tombstone, because he said that is right where he is headed.


Moving on, so now, after having seen two people take the LSAT, and successfully get accepted to law school (one person who actually copied off of me in paralegal school) my thought was "I can actually do this." When expressing my concerns for sitting there and my test anxiety, my mother said, "Don't be surprised if you do a lot better than you expect."


She is right. I have always been underestimating myself. Why settle when I know that I can do better? Just because I was scared? Well, that's stupid.


I was so lazy in college and only skimmed by my teeth. I actually wouldn't study for a test or write a paper until the day of. I would get great grades on those, but it was the lack of my daily participation and smaller assignments that brought me down.


Look at me now. I'm complaining that I have a 3.9. Its amazing what you can do when you actually apply yourself.


So, getting back to the quote, after having gone through eight years of mess, I might have things figured out. Furthermore, whoever said that college is suppose to be the defining years of your life, you are wrong sir.

Making the Grade

As I had posted previously, I thought that my first test in Corp Law was a bust. Apparently I didn't do nearly as bad as I thought I had. I am just going to have to learn how to accept "B's" though. Its hard for me, I use to have a 4.0, but a 3.9 isn't bad either, right?

I got a "B" on this test, and I was correct in that I had forgotten the importance of no double taxation for d/b/a's and General Partnerships. All in all, I did pretty well though. I knocked the terminology right out of the park and only missed a few points on those essays which were worth 12 points each.

This week the ABA came in to re approve the school's status and credentials. For some reason, some students starting whining about the cost in copying paper now in the computer lab. Really, that is your main complaint to the ABA which has nothing to do with the actually program? That is an issue to be taken up with the school, not the program. Geez people, get it together.

Anyway, now its time to get cracking on my project since there is only one this quarter. I have to take a "business" through the various levels of partnerships. I am going a little above in my report so that I can still have some wiggle room since he isn't doing any extra credit this time around. I still can't believe that.

Kicking the habit

Each day is never fully up and running until I have my cup of coffee in hand. I will usually go through three by the time lunch rolls around. Many times I just take a sip without looking or thinking anything about it. However, lately, when I take a glance down at my cup, I am horrified at the sight.

There is a ring, a thick one, signifying each sip that I take throughout the morning. I use to joke saying that "who knows what this is doing to my stomach." My step brother told me once to just not think about it, and carry on.

Well, for the past two mornings, my coffee has had something new added to the mix. A film floating on the surface, swirling in all its delight at contaminating my morning wake up. Ugh. Where did it come from? I know that its not the cup because I use a different one every morning. Today, just to experiment and in an effort to find the true perpetrator, I used a disposal cup. Nope, still there. Its not the pot either because I have washed in thoroughly on several occasions.

So the mystery is still... well a mystery.

In light of this, I have decided that since I have been an addict of the brown caffeinated, death in a cup, for eight years now, that perhaps its time for me to put it down. I am really not even suppose to have caffeine, truth be told.

My real dilemma is trying to find a suitable substitute. What else can open my still squinty eyes in the morning? What else can make staring into the computer not feel like looking into the sun?

I am open to any and all suggestions, so lay them on me.

Yesterday there was this huge thunder and lightning storm. I was afraid to carry an umbrella even. I took my shoes off before crossing the street after work so that I would slip and fall in the intersection (its happened before, shut it).

While in class, I was listening to all the commotion outside and thought to myself that today would not be a good one for a run. I like to run on the days that I can't make it into the gym. Well, when my teacher ended class early, this time because he was tired, I rushed home because the rain and storm had finally subsided.

As it was darker than usual, I just stayed in the subdivision this time. It was cool though, every now and then I would see a bolt of lightning come down off in the far distance. It inspired me to get a move on, that's for sure.

While running, I sometimes have a hard time clearing my head. Usually there is so much noise and so much going on in there that I can't hardly ever focus on one thing. For instance, I know that I still want to plan a trip to the mountains this winter to go skiing, but my big question is where I should take my Spring trip. Should I go back to New York and see what all I missed last time, should I go to Chicago or Philadelphia? There are so many places that I want to go and see, but I worry about having enough time and money to do it all. I still haven't made it to Europe yet either. Ahhhh.

I really want to take one of those Mediterranean cruises. I think that would be so much fun. You spend the day in Greece, go to bed, wake up and you are in Italy or something. Wouldn't that just be awesome? I also want to take an Alaskan cruise, and I have to, have to see an Ice Hotel. I heard about them last year on a television program and was just fascinated by the whole concept. It was so cool, no pun intended, okay maybe it was.

I still want to get my grandfather's airstream and fix it up. I was talking to my mother about it this weekend. I really don't see why my PT can't pull it. Next time I go and visit them, I'm going to check out the condition of the tires and see about hauling it out of there. I could go road tripping all over the place with that. Couldn't you just see me driving cross country with it? Well, I can.

The Rebellious Feline

Lately my cat, Mo, has been crying a lot more. Almost as much as he did when he first came into my life. Every five seconds he is meowing at me. What do you want cat? Seriously?

When I was out for vacation, I had Sarah S. watch him for me. It is usually a pretty easy going animal. I just told her to let him in at night, and out in the morning. That was it. That's how he has been for the last 8 months that I have had him. Apparently, while I was gone he went on the floor by the back door. When she called to tell me I thought, "Odd, he never, never goes out that door."

Well, since then it has happened two more times. I was trying to figure out why he is in such a mood. I know that its not because he can't hold it during the night. Even last night, I let him out three times before going to bed around midnight. Three times. I wake this morning to find a surprise next to my washing machine. Why Mo?

Needless to say, he and I had a rough morning. I threatened to ship him off to Atlanta... and that's when it hit me. He has lost more than half the attention he use to get, gone now. I was always away that I had forgotten that until recently, he got a lot more attention that I have been giving him. I feel so bad now. I know that he is just a cat, and that eventually he will learn to adjust, but his little world has been turned upside down. He use to come in the door anytime that someone would open it, during various times throughout the day. Now, he just sits in the driveway, waiting for me to pull up. I'm not joking, he literally is sitting in the driveway.

I don't know what he is going to do when I move. Then he will have to adjust to a new location and deal with less space. He cannot be an indoor cat, he can't stand to be locked in all day. I did that once and it was the only time I had actually heard him scream.

Good Old Fashion Heart-to-Heart

I went to visit my parents Saturday night and got there a little late. My mom had gone up to bed after I arrived so, I decided that I would visit with my dad for a minute before retiring myself.

I went into his office, felt bad to interrupting his work, but I sat down and just starting shooting the breeze with him. We have always had a pretty good relationship. Well, now we do. When I was in high school, I was the typical "my parents just don't understand me, I know better than they do" teenager. Needless to say, we bumped heads a lot.

However, now we can talk for hours on end and we only get one another's nerves once in a while. Usually involving computers (they are completely technologically impaired, but they don't think they are).

Anyway, he started telling me how proud he was of me and what all I have accomplished the last few months. He said that I was back to his Mere again. "You've got lots of irons in the fire again and you've got that spirit back. I don't know where you went in college, but I am glad that you are back. You are finally out of your slump and I love it."

How is it that parents know exactly what to say to make you cry, but then they feel bad when they do? Geez.

After we talked, I went off to bed. The next morning, I got up, woke my little brother up to see if he still wanted to go for a run with me. "No, get out, let me sleep." Big shocker there the little grump. I grabbed my phone and plugged my headphones in and I was off.

It had been so long since I had ran or walked that path. I remember how much I hated it when I had to walk home and carrying my sax with me. It use to seem like the longest mile in my life.

This time, it wasn't so bad. I was reminiscing about how much things have changed since I use to live there. So many houses gone, and in their place giant cracker jack box subdivisions. I looked at one house and remembered that I dated the guy who use to live there. We would break up, get back together, then break up again. It was crazy. This one subdivision use to be the property of another bf, my first actually. He was my best friend growing up. I haven't seen him since his freshman year of college actually and I have no idea where or what he is doing these days. Sad.

Then I made it to my old middle school. I remember all those days that I would stand outside waiting for my sister, brother or parents to pick me up. Adam was usually late being the socialite that he was in high school. Then I remembered when it was my turn to drop Kevin off there when I was in high school, I was usually late picking him up too. I learned how to drive in that parking lot. My uncle would get cones and make me parallel park between them. My mother would take me around the back and get me to drive in between the lamp posts.

Next to it, the large hill that leads up to the baseball fields. I remember having to run up and down that hill and around the fields for swim dry land practice. My coach would have to get on to me for not being fast enough and would make me do extra laps. Probably didn't help that he went to high school with my sister and aunt. I guess he expected more out of me.

Then I made it up to my old high school. There were some great years there. Although, I did have my fair share of bad ones too. They had added some new additions to it since I graduated. They look terrible, sorry, but they really do. I came around to the front of the building and looked at the field that I would practice on for marching band. I remember how lucky we all thought we were to be able to march on the grass instead of the parking lot. Ha, the parking lot was better. That field had holes that were invisible until you stepped right into them. Lots of twisted ankles. Thanks band director, let's do that again. It was also further away from the band room, so we had to carry out instruments, ladders, platforms and everything else under the sun further and through more doors that needed the middle door jam removed and replaced each time we did it.

Then it was time to turn around and head back home. On the way back, I started thinking about what all my dad had said to me the night before. Where did I go in college? When did I slow down and just loose myself? I did agree with him though. Although a bit more mature, I am back to that same ambitious kid that left those doors for the stadium and graduation. I remembered how much I planned to do when I walked out of those doors for the last time. When I cranked my car and drove out of the student parking lot, for good.

Its amazing how many curve balls are thrown at you along the way, and I have struck out a few times, but now, I've dusted off and I am ready for more. I will no longer occupy a bench in the dugout, its my time to shine. Look out pitcher, I'm coming for ya!

Birthday Extravaganza

Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday Dear (oh crap, who is it again?), Happy Birthday to you!

This weekend, I celebrated, three, that's right, three birthdays. A four year old's, a two year old's and a (hang on, let me count), forty-one year old's birthday. Whew. I am exhausted.

B-day 1 was for my most adorable, sweet, and loving nephew. He has already learned that whatever his mom won't give him, the chances are that Aunt Merwy will. Oops, have I already spoiled him that much? Sorry Frannie.

His birthday was a blast. The theme was rocket ships, robots and outer space. So, Frannie and Jai decorated accordingly and I supplied the cake to match. He was so excited. He came running up when I got there and climbed the nearest chair to look at it on the table. For his present, I got him a rocket ship that when you stomp on the launcher, it shoots up and a trail of bubbles are created. It was a lot of fun (yes, Aunt Merwy played with it).

My favorite present of his though, I have to say was this guy. Hahaha. Apparently in Asia a pro biker requires training wheels and when you turn this guy on, he plays the most horrendous high pitched version of "My Favorite Things" from The Sound of Music. My brother-in-law, as he so poetically said, "Do you want to hear the second most awful sound in the world?"

B-day 2. It was my cousin's son's birthday. I won't blame you if you can't follow that. He is my second cousin, but rather than confuse the guy more than necessary, he calls me Aunt Mere, or he would if he could talk. Off I went to the furthest corner of this great state to go and visit my cousins. (It actually isn't that far, just seems like it).

They had two kiddie pools out there for the toddlers and to help them beat the heat. Unfortunately, the adults only had two fans on the patio. Where's my inflatable pool shaped like a squirrel, huh?

It was great seeing everyone and hanging out with my family. I also got to see my uncle (who is young enough to be my brother, so that's how he gets treated) who lives out in California. With him he brought his new girlfriend for inspection. I felt so sorry for her. Just bring this girl out to a state that she has never been in and dump her in the middle of a family function and see if she can swim. Ha, I can't say much though, I did the same thing to Matt at my grandparents 60th wedding anniversary. Ooops.

She seems nice, but we will just have to wait and see what she says about us when she gets back to her reality and away from all this craziness.

Bday 3 was my other brother-like uncle. He, however did not have a party. I did talk to him on the phone after sending him his present via grandparent courier. Love you Uncle Matt, you're the man!!

Anyway, after all that, it was time to travel back to my reality. I tell you what, getting up this morning was no easy task. I am loving how busy I have been lately, but hopefully it will slow down soon and I can have a short break, for a minute.

Generation Difference

Today we had a person come in for deposing. Well, with her she brought her three children. She asked me where they could hide out until they were finished. I told her that they could just stay in the lobby and I got them drinks and they plugged in their electronic handheld games. They were pretty still and quiet, for a minute.

Soon, they started getting out their action figures and were playing with them in all the potted plants. When the receptionist left for class, they immediately took over his desk ledge. They started jumping around, I had to stop one from trying to go down the stairs. One almost ran straight into my boss's office. Geez, kids, where did you come from? Where were you raised?

Then, I looked over and noticed that there was only two of them. Where did the third go? He was going down the hall towards the conference room. It was like one of those slow motion sequences from a movie. "Nooooooooo." He had his hand on the doorknob and sure enough, he opened it.

Jacki and I both called down to him and told him to come back and that they needed to be left alone. What would I have done without her? I called her up to help because I simply do not do kids. Well, except for my nephews, but that's always different.

What do you do? You can't discipline someone else's children. You can't tell them to sit back down and don't move. Then they will complain to their parent and then a whole other can of worms is opened.

I started thinking about when I was a kid and had to accompany my parents for work or a meeting. I wouldn't dare think about moving from where my parents put me. I would sit still and play with whatever was given to me to or read whatever I had to read.

Granted there were a few times that we did some things after hours. Like ride the conveyor belt or ride the clothes elevator a few times, but that was all. (Haha, that's right Adam, I told on you. He rode the conveyor up and back down at Arrowhead. Busted). And if we broke it, we had to deal with our parents, that was it. We didn't go to someone else's office and play with things.

Perhaps I am being a little too over the top here, but it really gets me when people don't raise their kids? So many times I see kids going into stores with their parents without their hair combed and mismatching clothes. They all look like unmade beds. When did people stop caring. If you didn't want the responsibility of having children, then you should have thought twice before having them.

Pushing the Envelope

Yesterday I had a test in Corp Law. Just like me to forget the taxation importance for every buisness organization. My bad. Although, after talking to many of the other students, most of them felt pretty crappy afterwards as well. Seeing our general vacant expressions and lack of enthuasim, our teacher let us out early after only a few slides into the new chapter.

Having all this extra time on my hands and being particularly brain dead, I decided to go for a run. Not much thinking required there, right? Well, I got my key, locked the house, and began to stretch in the driveway. While doing so, a neighbor walked by with her dog that I see all the time when I run. I started thinking about how many times I had gone around those familar blocks and down to the playground, etc. Then I decided it needed to be done. I was going to do it.

I started towards the front of the neighborhood, rounded the corner, and out I went. So many times I have driven that path, but never, never I had step foot on it. It felt strange and exhilarating all at the same time. I ran to the fire station, thought to myself, you've come this far, keep going. So I did. I rounded the next corner, and kept going. I ran out of sidewalk, so I crossed the street and starting running down that side. I did a mini hurdle jump over someone's recycle bin they had left out on the curb.

I am so proud of myself for pushing my comfort zone that much. I ran all the way down to the EPA. Next time, I might run to the loop. Who knows?

I did learn something though, running while chewing gum is disgusting. I spat it out on my way back into some pushes. Bluh.

Roofing material

When we were kids, my dad often would give my brothers this talk. Shortly before my older brother left for the military, they covered our back porch. It was the middle of July, and blazing hot, like Georgia always is.

After building the supports and roof, it was time to cover it. One by one, my brothers and dad would carry packs of shingles up the ladder and onto the roof. One by one they nailed the shingles down, black no less, and endured the heat until the job was done.

Well, of course a parent can't pass up this opportunity to give a life lesson. He told my brothers that life and dating were like covering that roof. While you are climbing the ladder in life, and getting to where you need to be, you don't need to carry anyone with you. They will only slow you down and wear you out. Instead, climb that ladder, do what you need to do to make it to the top, and then look around and see what is already up there.

I know that this talk was for the boys, but I am just as ambitious as they are, so why can't the same go for me? I have carried my share fair of shingles, and I have been slowed down in the past before. Originally, if you care to recall, I wasn't going to do anything after college except for marry Virlyn and have children. Oops. Good thing that didn't pan out huh?

Now that I have finally gotten my path cleared away and ready to start the climb, I am not going to carry anything on my back. No sir, I am waiting for the top.

So, Sarah S., when we go out, don't be discouraged when I tell you that I am not ready to start a relationship with someone new. The fact of the matter is that I don't have time to get to know someone new nor give them the time needed to spend with them and build a relationship. I simply have too much on my plate.

Remember the Mere jelly from college? Well its back, I just don't want to spread it so thin like last time. Remember how exhausted I was all the time, every weekend was dedicated to some meeting or dedication or memorial service. Every week there was a test and work and group gatherings with friends.

I still want to hang out and enjoy my friendships that I already have, just can't really spare the time to make new ones. It kind of goes along with a previous post from earlier this year. No more tangents. Its only four more years until I am where I want to be. Don't worry my friends. I will be fine. I'm just being a little selfish for once. Isn't it about time?

He can come out at any time...

I was talking to my boss this morning. Catching up and seeing how she was doing with the final countdown starting up soon. She is scheduled for early September, and then little baby boy will be here. So exciting.

She said that she was finished with being pregnant. I said, "So you aren't one of those happy pregnant women, like that family with 20 kids." Her quick reply was "No!"

She started telling me about how lethargic she was feeling every day when she hadn't done anything particularly tiresome. Her "usual" comfortable spots like the couch or just lying down weren't now. She said that she is just uncomfortable all the time. Luckily, she said, there simply isn't enough room anymore from him to be kicking her rib cage. Instead, however, she gets elbowed in the rib cage. Which is really worse?

She just kept going on and on about how terrible it is and then she stared down at her lump and said, "You can come out anytime now, you hear that!."

I have to admit, I already knew that I was going to wait until my mid 30's for kids simply because I just have so much I need to get done before even thinking about it. She further told me that if I really wanted to put myself off the entire idea, that all I needed to do was attend one of her birthing classes. She said the stretch marks alone would be enough to deter me.

What's in a name?

I was talking to a friend of mine from college. I had made a comment about how long it had been since we last saw one another and something to do with politics since yesterday was Georgia's day at the poll.

He shocked me in his online response when he called me by my last name. No one calls me by that. In fact, hardly anyone, except my parents call me by my name. I have always been called Mere or Merebear or Mer-mer or some other derivative of that.

It got thinking, how long has it been since I got my nickname, and who was the first to call me that.

I believe that it all started in high school. I was friends with this older guy, but he was emotionally immature for his age. We would write letters to one another like crazy. At least three a day, each. I still have many of them. I called him Johnny (some times wohnny would make it in there. Geez, just think about it now makes me want to vomit, ugh) and he called me Mere-bear. He was the very first to call me by that name, and since then, it spread like wild fire. All my friends started calling me that. I hated it, it made me sound like a carebear or something. I didn't have a rainbow tattooed on my stomach, and I was definitely not pink (or anymore at least, that's a different story).

It was shortly thereafter, however, that my longest and oldest of friends started calling me Mer-mer. Why? Why? I would get notes from all my friends, all folded in different intricate ways, and all with different nicknames addressed to them. I also had this one boyfriend that when he got too tired and lazy, he just called me "M." Really dude, really?

Finally, it was my junior year in high school when my boyfriend at the time I believe simply called me Mere. Ahhh, I can handle that. When I went to college, I did my best to leave all nicknames behind me. I was starting anew. However, just a week in the nicknames began once more.

Jeremy was the worst. I hated, I mean absolutely hated him. He was 28 at the time and had no business hanging out with 18 year olds. He was one of those professional students, but was no where near as cool as Van Wilder. I didn't mind it so much when Sarah S. or Sarah N. called me Mere. I didn't mind it when Ben or Billy or Mike would call me Mere. But when Jeremy did, it made my blood boil. He would also call me "chicken of the sea" because I went through like 8 or 10 fish my freshman year. I blame the asbestos. When he would call me either one, I would just think, "You are not my friend sir, you cannot call me that!"

And that's when I realized it. I liked my nickname. Go figure.

Finally he left. I think that he went to Texas or something. Good riddance. Then, I was just left with Mere. Works for me.

Now, Only one person still calls me Merebear, but I don't mind it when she does. Britt, you can call whatever you like. You are too sweet.

Now I am only called Mere, which I love. If you are my friend, I bet you have hardly ever said my actual name. Eh? I'm right aren't I? And, if you are my nephew, I am Aunt Merwy, which makes my heart all warm and fuzzy (don't tell anyone though).

My Expanding Closet

My closet is getting larger and larger, but in a different way. Last night I was putting away my laundry and started sorting out (again) what I could no longer get away with wearing. Pants that were about to flat out fall off, shirts that could double as maternity wear, and the like. There goes half my pants.

Furthermore, today when I was getting ready for work, I put on one of my favorite dresses. Its the most that I have spent on myself in a while when I purchased this. Now, it most certainly can double as a maternity dress, meaning I might have shoved a pillow just to see. Don't you just love me? Yes, yes you do.

However, this dress doesn't look too terrible at the moment. I do have to wear a different belt with it than the one that it came with, but it is still fashionable. I just can't get rid of it yet. It has pockets for crying out loud. Pockets!

I just can't wait until I go shopping again with Sarah N. in August. This time, we might be hitting up the ATL. Also, I did promise Frannie that I would go bargain hunting with her. Hopefully lots of possibilities await me.

Until then, I will just watch the emptiness in my closet continue to grow.

Frannie's lament (and possibly others)

Well, as I had mentioned before in a previous blog, I told Frannie something this weekend that did not make her too happy. I know that there are others who are still unaware, so, here it is.

As I posted before I left for vacation, Matt came by and apologized for a lot of things. And, as I had said, I could no longer be mad at him for it. I know, I'm more forgiving than I should be, but that is besides the point.

The point is, Matt and I have become friends. I just can't allow two years of my life to have passed by and nothing come from it. What a waste, right?

I just thought that it wasn't fair to be hiding this fact or not mentioning it, or what have you. So I am being up front and honest to all. Please understand that I am still that strong and independent person and I am not going to lose myself again. I am so happy with who I am that I refuse to let that happen again.

My Sarah is all grown up

For as long as I have known her, I have been telling Sarah S. that she is far too nice and needs to get a little mean every once in a while. Now, I am not asking her to be as heartless as others have claimed that I am, but just a little tough.

This weekend, she did just that. There was this guy that she met a few weeks ago, with my help (maybe I shouldn't admit that, maybe it was my fault. Sorry.) and he has been acting pretty sketchy since day one. Well, they were texting back and forth, but it would take him forever to reply, it took him about a week to finally ask her out on an actual date, and then, he completely sketched out. She told him about her upcoming trip and how she was going to be gone for a week and wanted to see if they could get together before she left. He said sure and that he would call her in a few. Well, that few turned into 24 hours, then when she finally heard back from him, it was complete bullshit. She called him out on it and basically said adios.

I am so proud of her. She actually got under his skin to because he immediately started texting her and getting all defensive. Dude, if you come up with a story, stick to it and think it through, the holes were far too obvious.

I am so happy that Sarah is finally standing up for herself. Very proud, very proud.

"You can be my wingman anytime"... "Bullshit, you can be mine!"

This weekend was a mess, an absolute mess, but some awesome things came out of it.

Friday went by super fast at work. I turned around and it was 5 o'clock already. Then it was time to get my oil changed. I had gotten it done at a superstore last time and it was super expensive too! No thank you. So this time I tried something new. I went to the 3.99 car wash where they just so happen to do oil changes to. It was a terrific exprience. I just rolled my window down, sat there, and they did the rest. I didn't even have to get out of the car. There was no wait, it was fantastic. Then, for getting my oil changed, they give you their top of the line car wash ($14 value) for free. Terrific. Then I got to use their super duper, suck your face off, vaccums to clean out my car. They also have these cool "rug beaters" that you just stick your car matts in, press the button, and it cleans them and gets all the hair and crunched in cheetos off. The best part, it was free! (I like free stuff, can you tell?)

Then I met up with Sarah S. to run some errands and buy stuff for my fabulous tubberware party that I was having the next day. The theme was Jello Shots and Flip Flops. Then we had a terrific dinner together where we were almost brutually attacked by a yellow jacket.

I have never made jello shots before, so Sarah and I decided to try it together. We had to cut the ingredients down by half since I wasn't making nearly as much as the receipe called for. What would I have done with 28 Jello Shots?

After making them, and a huge mess on her counters, we downloaded a movie via her online rental account and watched a pretty good indie film. I was really surprised at how good it was, and the acting for that matter.

The next morning it was time to set up. I steam cleaned my carpets while my landlord was outside making all kinds of noises doing lawn maintenance. I guess he was trying to "up" the curb appeal in hopes of selling the house. Good Luck buddy. Why don't you lower the price?

Anyway, after all the cleaning I had to make my flip flops for the contest. They were so cute. I might have had a few mishaps in making them though. Why is it that super glue will dry instantly to your fingers and nothing else? My index finger is still raw. Ouch.

Unfortunately, the party was a bust. Only one person came who I had invited and had expected to come. I know that many of you had valid excuses and told me beforehand, but one person did not. She even told me the day before that she was coming and bringing her grandchild because she had to watch him that day. We sat there for 30 extra minutes waiting for her to arrive. I finally called her and she said that she wasn't coming. Thanks for calling.

Anyway, so my fabulous sister did the party for me and my friend. We still had a great time and talked, and talked, and talked so more. Also, apparently my roomba is more talented then I give him credit for. As told by Frannie, roomba was eyeing her from across the house when she first arrived, after I had gone out to help her unload her car, roomba came after her with ninja knives and eye glowing eyes. Sure, Frannie, whatever you say dear. Although, I have to admit, she is not the only person to have told me that roomba attacked them. Sarah N., did roomba have ninja knives when he came for you?

I also told my sister something that she wasn't too happy about, but that is another blog.

Anyway, afterwards, Frannie was off to yet another party (she works hard for the money), and Sarah came over since she got put on call at the hospital. We went to the mall, Target and who knows where else looking for outfits for her. She is leaving me soon, she and Sarah N. for California for a week. What am I going to do without them for a week?

When we got to Target, I found this great, and inexpensive, pair of tennis shoes. I think I might like this pair better than my old ones actually. They may end up being my lawn shoes.

Since I had this rare opportunity to hang out with Sarah, we decided to make the most of the night, and we went downtown where I played her wingman, again. It was great though. We had a nice and easy time. While out, we ran into our good friend Jamie. He is such a sweetie.

Then we went to an oldie of ours and had a drink that we finally found someone to make. We had asked for it before in the past, but no one knew what we were talking about and it was always a complete miss. This is about how the conversation went.

Me: Do you remember a long time ago, and I mean a long time ago, there was this drink called a pantie drop. This must have been like four years ago. Do you know what I'm talking about?

Bar Tender: I think so, its a drop shot right?

Me: (No freaking kidding dude) Yeah that's it.

It was exactly what we had been waiting for, for sooooo long.

The next morning, so how I had talked Sarah into going to spin class with me. Muahahahaha. She had a good time though, but her butt will hurt for a while, especially since she will be doing it again with her friend at their gym today.

Then, as if we hadn't spent enough time together (I'm going to miss her) we went to the grocery store, where I had a total Kroger win. For $13 I got enough food for me and Mo for a month. The fact that my stomach is the size of a pea might have contributed as well.

Then, we had this craving that had to be satisfied. Dun, dun, dunnnnnn. Taco Bell anyone. It was soo good. I know that it had only been a week since I had it, but it was soo good. I guess that's the way all cravings go really.

Ahh, what a weekend. Now, I am super tired this week, but I have so much to get done. I have a test, a paper due, and I cake for my most wonderful nephew. I cannot believe that he is actually going to be 4. Ahhh, where did all the time go?

Yes, I am a nerd, back off

So, for my vacation, Britt, Rickey and I headed to the Magical Wizarding World of HP. That's right, I'm 25 and I went to HP, drank a butterbeer and road the ride in the Hogwart's Castle. So sue me.

It was great, and I had a fantastic time.

On the way down there, we had fun singing, talking and of course a little mischief.

Driving Ms. Daisy anyone?

When we finally pull up to hotel and checked in, apparently they did not book us a double. Not cool. Then, when we got to the room that they had assigned us, oh geez, what a nightmare. There was no air conditioner, just a hole where it should be. The dresser was pulled out from the wall and the television was missing. Ahhhh. Leave it to Britt to go down there and open a can of whop ass.

Finally, when we got situated in the final and last room that they had assigned us, it was time to get this vaca under way.

We decided to hit the pool since the ride was so long and the next day we were heading out of town again. When we got down there though, there must have been a birthday party or something because there were tons, and I mean tons of people. There wasn't a five foot gap for even the lightest of swimming activities. Every few minutes a large group of guys were carrying and dumping someone in the deep end, which wasn't very deep. Then the security guard came out and kicked everyone out. Well, that was short lived.

The next morning, we got up early enough to hit the free continental breakfast. It was packed. Everyone from the pool the night before was down there, and it seemed like they were all waiting in line for a waffle too. While standing in line for the waffle maker, Rickey, Brittany and I munched on some Lucky Charms, after all, they are magically delicious.

After Breakfast, it was time to head out. To Augustine we go, high ho, high ho. We met up with a friend of Britt and Rickey's that I had met previously a while back at their wedding. We went shopping and had to restrain ourselves, but somehow still made it out with chocolate chip cookies. Oh well, its vaca right?

The beach was a little stormy, but we still have fun. It was a bit frightening every now and then to look over and seen in the distance a huge bolt of lightening striking the water, but no one died. All is well.

After the beach it was time to hose off and head out for some dinner. Not before a little friendly domestic dispute that is.

After dinner, which was delicious, we got our own private ghost tour. Heather, our friend, lives in St. Augustine and she used to give tours with one of those companies in the old part of town. We walked down to the fort where she told us some toe curling stories and I will admit, I got the shivers a few times myself. It was a great time though. Afterwards, it was time to head back to Orlando. I did all I could to try to stay awake because I was so tired from the day's activities.

The next morning, well, we slept in. McD's for us. When we got to the park, it was daja vu for me. I hadn't been there in eight years or so. It was like being that kid all over again. It was awesome. We rode all the classics and a few newbies too. The new coaster at Universal Studios was amazing. It takes you straight, and I mean a complete vertical rise, up to the first hill where it just lets you go. The best part is that you get to customize you ride by picking which song you want to play during the course of the adventure. They also shoot a video of you for the entire ride for purchase. Hahahaha. I bet mine was hilarious. I screamed, hooted and hollered like crazy.

The last stop of our evening was HP. It was so cool, and we had waited so long that most of the children in the park had already left. The main attraction wait was usually about two to three hours. We only stood in like for 45 minutes. That's right, we know how to play. Britt and I rode the Dragon Challenge probably about four times as well. The wait to get into many of the shops was crazy, so I opted out for many of them. I have a thing about tight spaces and lots of people. No thank you!

They rest of the trip was easy going and a blast. We just rode the rides and kicked it easy. I was so impressed that we were able to get Rickey to actually ride one coaster. He is sensitive when it comes to those and he took a big step and believed us when we said it wasn't bad.

Very proud Rickey, very proud.

I had a great time hanging out with them, but at the same time, so glad to be home. You never really realize how much you miss it until you leave. My bed never felt so comfortable. Although the first day back at work was a crazy one for me (it really felt like Monday), it still wasn't too bad. Now I just have to catch up on my school work and all will be well.

Words of encouragement

On my drive back to town from Britt and Rickey's house after our most excellent adventure, some songs came on the radio that spoke to me.

Now, the first needs a little background info. After my sis, Tara, died, we were going through some of her last possessions, and in with other things was the single of the song, I hope you dance. For some reason, that song comes on the radio as always just the right time. When ever I am feeling down or in the dumps, it brings me back up. Its like she is perhaps giving me encouragement the only way she can.

So, I was flipping through my channels because I couldn't find anything that I wanted to hear, I was tired from the long car ride and from the scorching Florida sun. The next button that I hit, this song had just come on, form the very beginning. Okay, stop your pushing sis, I'll listen.

The next song to come on was one that was either by the Police or U2, can't remember, but it added to my already misty eyes. Then the final blow, A Hero Lies in You. Come On! Enough already!! I'm in slight misty tears here. (Remember, I am heartless and crying just doesn't happen to me, easily).

I starting thinking about how far I have come, how I am back to the way I was, if not better. I needed to remind myself how easy it was to curl up and get right back where I was before. I refuse to lose myself again. I will not let it happen! I was never unhappy with myself, but never in my life have I been thrilled with my direction in life and the overall circumstances of the same.

Unfortunately, due to the vacation, I was away from the gym for five days straight. It was difficult to say the least to get back into the swing of things. I forced myself to push it during spin class last night. It would have been all to easy to get off the bike, wiped it down and said, "Bye now." But no, I am not going to do that. However, I accidentally left my tennis shoes at Britt's so I have to buy a spare pair so that I can do other things at the gym, including personal training next week.

The main point of this blog is remind myself that I need to continue to push myself. To look back at how far I have come, and the distance left to travel. I know that I set a goal of 15 more pounds, but wouldn't it be terrific if I surpass that goal? If I accomplish more than what I had expected?

Ahhh, deep breath

Its finally here. Vacation. I have been waiting for over a year to take a real vacation. Not a trip to see relatives or someone else's, but a real vacation.

We are hitting the beach for a day and then its time for the main attraction. Harry Potter. That's right, I am dragging my adult butt to the Magical World of Harry Potter, and I could not be more excited about it.

Because I am so accident prone, my coworker said that she would be waiting to count my injuries when I got back. I told her that I was going to do my best to avoid them since I will be on roller coaster mostly. Usually accidents involving them require an ambulance or hearse. Neither or which I want to take a ride in.

Taking it easy on myself

So I thought that I was going to be doing myself a favor by dropping a class this quarter. You know, not over stress myself like last time.

Oops. The night of the first class I find out that there is only one project and no extra credit. What?!? I always, always do the extra credit. And what is the project you might ask? I have to incorporate a business and take it into the different level of a business. Awesome. Cannot wait.

He said that we could use a fictitious company, so I decided that Cakes by Mere is going to work just great for this. Plus, if I ever do decide to take it pro, I'll have the know how.

Unfortunately I am not starting this quarter off on a good start either. I will be missing classes all this upcoming week due to my vacation. But, right now, I need the vacation more. I will have a test when I get back, but if I take adequate notes and go over the subject matter a dozen times, I should be good. Wish me luck!

The Unthinkable

I had been saying for, well since it happened really, that I would never hear what I wanted to hear. The simple phrase, "I'm sorry."

To my surprise, I got it. Come Tuesday I got a knock at the door. He sat down, as did I, and he apologized for everything. He said that he had come to realize what a complete asshole he had been and that I was completely undeserving of it. Furthermore, he stated that his apology was long overdue. Damn right skippy.

A while back, I had already let go of most my anger and had moved on from the entire situation. Honestly, it wasn't worth staying angry. All I was doing was holding myself back. I was tired of it, so I stopped.

Whatever anger had stayed or lingered without my realizing, surely must be gone now. How can you stay angry at someone who admits that they were wrong? You can't. Perhaps I am more of a forgiving person than I should be, and I have been told that in the past, but so be it. That's just how I am.

From Casual to Frumpy Fridays

Its Friday. Wooohooo. One day left until my most excellent vacation. I tell you what, its going to be hard to have to work an actual full work week when I get back. Ugh.

Lately, however, Friday's have not been my favorite. Sure, its the last day of the week, you get to dress down for work, but I never feel my best on these days. Why you might ask? I have no clothes that fit.

Its an on going dilemma with me. For instance, today I am wearing one of my favorite pairs of pants. Mainly because they are sentimental to me more than anything. Its the pair of pants that I purchased back when I lost my first pant size. I love these, but here they are, literally hanging off my butt. I look like an old bag women with these on.

Its upsetting that I did not have one pair of causal pants that I can wear with a straight face. Not even jeans. I told myself that until I stop losing weight and are just maintaining myself, I will only purchase clothes from consignment shops like Cilly's or Plato's. It just seems so wasteful to purchase clothes at full or even marked down prices knowing that they aren't going to fit in a month.

I think that I really understand the frustration that my parents went through with all of us. However, unlike now, they had hand-me-downs to rely on. I have no one that I can take clothes from. Sarah S. is close in size, but she is petite. Sarah N. has no hips (or maybe I just have enough for the both of us) and Frannie, ha, don't make me laugh. The woman doesn't break 100 pounds unless she is pregnant.

I have already given most of my old clothes away, mainly to a friend that I tried to get into spinning with me because she expressed the interest in losing some pounds. However, I gave up (and I'm sorry to say that) on her when she stood me up a few weeks ago. She said that she was coming, never showed and she did not respond to any of my text messages when I was trying to locate her. I guess you can't help people who just don't want it.

Anyway, unfortunately these pants are bound for the sell bin at Plato's. That is if they will take them. If not, perhaps I will keep this pair, in the back of my closet somewhere to remind me of just how far I have come.

Next month, I'm going shopping, I absolutely have to, otherwise I will have nothing, literally, nothing to wear. Sarah N., I will need your unfailing shopping guidance for this trip. So, mark your calendar.

My climb to Victory

Last night I had a dream about that tree at the lake that I so desperately wanted to climb, but Kevin would not allow it.

I am about 15 pounds away from my final goal (its really less, but I always tend to short change myself), and for some reason, that tree in my dream represents the finish line. I want to scale the 30 foot climb, stand up, gather my courage and confidence, count to three, and jump!

I want to be able to let go of all fear and hesitation. I have always been scared of uncontrolled heights. Heck, just standing on my counter top to get a dish from the top shelf was scary.

Back in December, I think I pushed myself more than I had in a long time. I went to the City Museum in St. Louis. There they have old airplanes suspended in mid air. The only way to get there is to climb. Well, I did it. I climbed all over that place, inside and out. I even went under the floor in a tight squeeze and almost got stuck, but I did it.

So, why not the tree? Why not just let go? Next time I go there, down to the lake, I am going to do it. I think that I owe it to myself, I've come so far, therefore I can't deny myself this.

Ouch...Oh Crap, what the &*%$!!!!!!!

Well, Britt finally finished posting the pictures, so I can now finish this post. I really need to get a camera.

This past weekend, the 4th of July weekend to be exact, was the best weekend by far. It really was the weekend that seem to never end. Well, until I had to go back to work that is.

This time, instead of following the weekend in chronological order, like I normally do, I decided to mix things up. I shall share this adventure in reverse.

Monday

One word can really sum up this entire day. Ouch. My body was in so much pain and was sore and bruised all over. Bruises I didn't even realize that I had until I was washing up for bed.

That morning, Sarah N. and I were suppose to head over to the pool for one last day in the sun before heading back to reality. Yep, that didn't happen. We looked at each other and without saying a word, we knew that we were just going to hang out and watch movies all day. Which we did. Sarah S. came over too for a little bit to partake in a movie before going to the gym. Lame Sarah, very lame. :)

Sunday

Whoohooo! Happy 4th everybody!! It also happens to be my Uncle David's birthday too!

What a day on the lake. Sarah N. and I had spent the day at Rickey and Brittany's the night before and woke up tired but ready to go. Unfortunately, Rickey had to work that day so he couldn't come to the lake with us.

After some home made waffles curtesy of our lovely host, it was time to head out. The second, and I mean the second, that we got there, it was time to get on the boat. We packed probably more people on there than we should have, but we were on a mission. My cousin Jeffrey skiied out to our destination, and then it was play time. We rode out to the cove with the rope swings. With my new bathing suit on and no fear of accidentally exposing myself, I climbed the platform, held on and swung out.

When I landed and came out of the water, I realized that I did something stupid. When I fell into the water, some how I got the rope tangled on my leg and I had rope burn down my left thigh and calf. The same leg with the sprained ankle. I must not like that side of my body or something. Oh well, that didn't stop me from doing it again.

There is also this tree with steps all the way up. Basically you just climb the tree and jump out from it. Sarah N. did and then I was ready to go, but Kevin wouldn't let me. He said that he did not want to have to explain to our mother why I was broken. Next time, next time I will do it. You just wait.

After our "Tarzan" impersonations, it was time to head back. My cousin, Jeffrey, is a cop and had to go back to work. Well shoot. Its okay though, he left his wife and son with us to continue in the fun.

Later, it was time for some tubing, and oh did we! Battle tubing galore. Sarah N. kept falling off. I fell a few times, mainly because Sarah N. would fall and then land on my tube and ontop of me and throw us both off. Gee, thanks girl. Appreciate it.

Needless to say, we all, Sarah N., Britt and I are covered with bruises, tube abrasions and the other such injuries.

Saturday

Wow. I am getting old. It was way to difficult to get going after the previous night's adventures. A 25 year old body does not recovery nearly as fast as a 24 year old body, that is for sure.

After a couple of glasses of water, some sleeping in and a nice shower, it was time to head out.

For some reason, this little town that I have to pass through to get to the lake had closed down its town square. I don't know how to get back on the road that I need to be on without going through the square. Crap. I asked some of the event security and volunteers, and none of them could help. "Sorry ma'am, I'm not from around here."

Well then, Sarah N. got out my phone and pulled up the GPS. I parked examined the map, and with a few detours and turn arounds, finally got back to where I needed to be. I finally arrived to the lake house to see my dear friends Rickey and Brittany. They are by far one of my most favorite couples to hang with. You are never the third wheel with them. Its great.

We headed out onto the lake with Rickey's father behind the wheel. "Ouch, crap, geez that hurt. I really think that he is trying to kill us. What the &*%$!"

At one point, during an episode of battle tubing, apparently I became a Sub-mere-rine. Rickey, who was our spotter, said that he turned away for a mintue, then looked back and did not see me nor the tube. He thought that it had broken free and I was floating out on the lake somewhere. Then, all of the sudden, I popped up from under the water. I was completely submerged, but I was still hanging on to the tube, which means that I did not fall and it did not count towards Britt's win. Ha!

Finally, my time was over. I got to enjoy watching Britt and Sarah N. duke it out for a minute, and only a minute. Then they decided that we needed to double up on the larger tube. So, it was Britt and I against Sarah N. on her one tube. "You're going down chica!"

After all the fun, and once the exhaustion had set in, it was time from some fireworks. They were so pretty and there were mutliple people out there doing them, so we got a great show.

When we got back to Britt's to stay the night, Sarah N. and I passed out after washing up. I slept so sound that I don't think I moved once.

Friday

Friday at work was a long day. The morning went by fast, but the afternoon lasted a life time. I had to walk almost five miles and back to do some research for a case of ours at work. The really impressive part was that I did it in flip flops and made it back in one piece and before the office had closed.

After closing up the office, it was time to meet Sarah N. and Sarah S. at the grocery store to buy our ingredients to make our home made pizza for dinner. It was so yummy.

Then we were ready to get the night underway. We got all dolled up and rolled out to downtown. What a great night. We met a couple that Sarah N. had met one year on a cruise of her's that she had made friends with and kept in touch. They were so much fun.

We went to our usuals and danced the night away. I had no idea that Jamie could dance swing with me. He was fabulous. I haven't had a suitable, and willing, partner to dance with in such a long time. Thanks Jamie.

Our finally stop was 8e's bar. I love that place. They play all my favorites. What a great time.

We finally got back at like 3 or something. My cat was not pleased with us.

Oh well, he'll deal.

Away, thanks to all my buddies for a fantastic weekend. Ya'll keep me going and feeling young.

Yay Summer. Wait, awww...

That's right. Today marks the start of this new quarter. Just when I was free for a moment, they pull you back in. But, the exciting thing is that this also marks the start of my scholarship that I won. I didn't have to pay a dime (except for books, but they are a racket anyway) for this quarter. Sweet!

I didn't even get a letter in the mail from the school saying what my balance was. That's right, I don't owe you a dang thing!

This quarter I have decided to take it easy on myself. I dropped a course that I was originally going to take during my lunch break, but last time that I did that I ended up with a "B." Not cool, not cool at all. So, I am sticking with my online and one in class course. Apparently the online class is completely online in that I do not have to show up for exams. The instructor is in Wisconsin for crying out loud. How does someone who teaches in Wisconsin end up teaching a course in Georgia?

Hopefully it will be fine though. I took that class back in undergrad, but apparently things have changed and I have to take it again. Stupid economics. Here's what I think that class should consist of... Everyone is poor, the end.

Anyway, here's to a good and successful quarter!

The Secret of Nimh

Yesterday, after the gym of course, I went home to cut my grass.

While I was hacking away at the forest that was growing in my backyard, I saw grasshoppers and all other kinds of flying insects flee with every push of the mower. It made me think about a childhood favorite of mine.

The Secret of Nimh.

Remember how they couldn't move before the harvest because little Timmy was sick? So sad. And then the protagonist tried to botch the entire operation of moving the cinder block house. Grr.. mean rat!

That was a great movie, and I am shocked that I don't own it. This may have to be remedied in the near future.

Sour faces

Yesterday was my second assessment since starting personal training. My first was back in the end of March. In four months I have managed to cut down 4% of my body fat. Woot.

After that poking and grabbing and pinching of the very scientific equipment (its primal, could they really not come up with a better way of doing this?) it was time for our workout.

Ouch!

During the course of the absolute pain and torture, he told me that I make sour faces while working out. Okay, what kind of faces should I be making?

Me: I thought they were angry faces.

Brian: Nope, not angry at all, kind of funny actually.

Well then.

The last exercise that we did was pathetic. He handed me a ball and said to throw it down on the ground using my entire body as hard as I could (without smacking my face). Apparently I am not very good at it. I told him that I felt like I should be angry to do this. He said, "Good, get angry." But I wasn't angry, and couldn't get angry.

Better luck next time.